Monday, August 30, 2010

"The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

But do you know what else it begins with? A hearty breakfast.

Hi, I'm Lao Tzu. When I wake up at 3:45 every morning, the first thing I do is self-flagellate. Then I meditate for 9 hours while wearing a shirt made out of goat hair. However, following that I always have a big bowl of Kellog's Special K cereal. It gives me the energy I need to meditate for another 17 hours while denying myself all worldly pleasures, like taste. Special K is very bland.

I once said “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be”.

I can't remember what I meant by that, but I almost certainly was eating Special K right before I said it.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Lizz said...

You will probably never see this. But I still think you're fucking hilarious.

November 13, 2011 at 9:58 PM  

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